Friday, December 16, 2011

Gorak Welcomes

Christopher Hitchens

I was a great admirer of his, and read most of his on-line essays from the last 5 years or so. I sometimes think about reading his books, but I figure it would just reinforce my own point of view. I suppose I should reconsider. After all, I really don't think of myself as an atheist.

In a way, you have to admire how he lived his life. I doubt he played a single video game. He pursued his work and his passions, which included expensive scotch and cigarettes. He knew he was gambling with his life, and he lost that wager. Ultimately, that was something he regretted. 62 years of age is just sadly young, but I know how hard it can be to not be the worst part of ones self.

I'm really sorry to see Hitch gone. I wish I was a bit more like him in many ways, and glad I'm not in others.. but there can be no doubt that in the years he did have, he really lived them.

He spent a great deal of his life contemplating the ultimate question. I guess now he has his answer, or not, as the case may be.


Many of the obits I've read have made the crucial point. Hitchens was the last of his kind. He wrote as sort of a love affair with the English language, and was obsessed with the literature. The world does not breed that type anymore. It's all about twitter, and blogs, and the capitalistic side of writing - the money.


I try my best, now, to avoid news of tragedies and such.. anything negative, because it doesn't help with the situation of my current health problem. I'm not, by nature, a depressed person but it has occurred to me that the current problem I have will not ever change. It could be far more serious than the doctors let on.

I know other people have to live with debilitating illness, with no chance for a normal life. Just look at Stephen Hawking. I'm sure he'd love to have my problem instead of his.

Simply reading about the end of Hitchens hasn't helped my mood at all.


Greenwald has an essay on the canonization of the recently departed. He makes a valid point.


kris said...

allow me to try to lighten it:

There is a history of colon cancer in both my mother and father's side. Last year, Mamasan had about a yard of bowel removed. Not cool.

All of the adult kids were encouraged to get a colonoscopy. I had an appointment, then didn't go because of a work commitment.

A friend whose gone up periscope a few times said that the "work commitment" crap wouldn't cut it if I did have something that needed to be zapped.

I made a further appointment on the evil socialist National Death Service.

In preparation for the same, I was given Biscodol and Citrafleet (?) to take along with gallons of Gatorade.

Things went pretty smooth at first, what I expected. Then, in the middle of the night, I was sat on the toilet with a bucket thinking I was going to pass out. Missus says my face was the color of the white tiles. I don't normall sip Gatorade in the bathroom, but it brought me back.

I went in to the doctors the next day, hoping I was clear.

They don't knock you out here. I had one of the 'pams and something else in an IV and watched the inside of my guts on TV.

She found nothing and the evil socialist nurse helped me up and held my hand to a private area where I was reunited with my civilian clothes.

After a cup of tea, I was free to leave with Missus.

I didn't go to work that day - and I should have taken the next day off too - as the drugs made me a bit forgetful - like did I ask for £20 or £30 out of the ATM. I just pushed the button and can't remember.

So when my mom asked "when do you have to go back?" I said, "never".

So this is a long-winded way of saying that hospitals suck - and that I can't imagine the worry of not knowing.

Here's hoping that the treatment you've been given sorts it all out and you don't have to be their pin-cushion for much longer.

All the best and take it easy

Bill said...

Hope you are doing better. Why don't you get a second opinion somewhere else like Mayo. You are in my thoughts.

Kor said...

Hope the mood improves, depression isn't the most fun thing in the world. Through they do hand out some pretty cool drugs for that stuff (that being said I've found they can make you acutely aggressive if you stop taking them cold turkey).

Tom said...

It's not really depression per se, it's a headache and tinnitus that is constant. That causes some anxiety and such.

My PCP put me on one med for serotonin imbalance as she said for "diagnostic purposes" without knowing whether or not I have a serotonin issue and the neurologist put me on nortriptyline at minimum dose to help with the headache. Both require time to have an effect. So far the improvement is minimal.

Tom said...

And thanks again for the well wishes.

I just took Riley and Token for a walk around the park, which turned into a very fast walk as Riley wanted to go fast. My head feels a little better for having done it, and believe me, I did not want to do it but the dogs aren't getting enough exercise while John can hardly walk (new knee inc.) and I'm a zombie.

I'll try and force myself to do it every day. It couldn't hurt.