God Told Me

He spoke.. and said everyone who reads this has to send me 1000 dollars or else.. God will give me a hang nail.

TULSA, Okla. - Twenty years ago, televangelist Oral Roberts said he was reading a spy novel when God appeared to him and told him to raise $8 million for Roberts' university, or else he would be "called home."

Now, his son, Oral Roberts University President Richard Roberts, says God is speaking again, telling him to deny lurid allegations in a lawsuit that threatens to engulf this 44-year-old Bible Belt college in scandal.

Richard Roberts is accused of illegal involvement in a local political campaign and lavish spending at donors' expense, including numerous home remodeling projects, use of the university jet for his daughter's senior trip to the Bahamas, and a red Mercedes convertible and a Lexus SUV for his wife, Lindsay.

She is accused of dropping tens of thousands of dollars on clothes, awarding nonacademic scholarships to friends of her children and sending scores of text messages on university-issued cell phones to people described in the lawsuit as "underage males."

But of course.. this is an aberration.. not all religious institutions are ripping off their gullible faithful.... just the vast majority of them. But hey - God is commanding that Dick Roberts live it up off a fools dime... or retirement.. whatever.

Holy fuck.. this is great!

• A longtime maintenance employee was fired so that an underage male friend of Mrs. Roberts could have his position.

• Mrs. Roberts — who is a member of the board of regents and is referred to as ORU's "first lady" on the university's Web site — frequently had cell-phone bills of more than $800 per month, with hundreds of text messages sent between 1 a.m. to 3 a.m. to "underage males who had been provided phones at university expense."

Jesus Christ on toast.. she's fucking young boys.. LOL

There's lots more.. but it's simply amazing that in this era.. people STILL don't understand what religion is all about. It's about fucking you.. literally, and figuratively.

Please God.. call all these assholes home.. LOL